Roman and Micah were matched in February of 2006. “The novelty of what I do had to wear off before he could really open up to me,” said Roman, “but over time he learned to trust me and see me as his friend.  He realized that I was genuinely interested in his wellbeing.  Now we are not just mentor and mentee, but we are friends.”

Before Roman entered his life, Micah did not have a consistent, positive male role model in his life.  “I don't have a father or even a brother in my family, and most of my relatives who live in San Diego are not men,” said Micah.  “So, I really wanted a Big Brother.”  And Roman has been that and more.  Roman said he intentionally tries to make time for just Micah, away from his family, so it is time just for the two of them.  “But what has been so great,” Roman noted, “is that he really likes to spend time with my family too.  He gets along so well with my two young boys.”  Micah said, “I really feel a part of the family.”

Micah’s mom recognized the need for a positive role model as well, and called BBBS of SDC to help her find a mentor for Micah who could offer her son a male perspective and be a buddy just for him.  “Micah is like a big bear, people might think he would be aggressive, but he is not,” said Micah’s mom, Ramona.  “Roman is also a big guy and Micah can see that it is okay to be yourself.  Micah has learned to feel more accepted and develop his own personality.  They have talked about choices and now Micah is more expressive, independent and creative. I don’t know what I would have done without Big Brothers Big Sisters!”

Micah is at a new school which is both challenging and hard, but his mother says that he is now thriving. Micah said, “Roman has made me think clearer, and I am not as negative as when I first met him.  He has taught me to never give up and he makes me want to work harder.”  Roman said he is tough on Micah sometimes, challenging him to work harder at school and in sports.  Roman is very proud of the perseverance that he has seen develop in Micah.

Roman says he has always been interested in the BBBS program, and has always believed in giving back.  Roman started the Roman Oben Foundation, which is dedicated to promoting positive development of youth through football, literacy and other community outreach projects.   Roman said, “I grew up with a single mom almost my whole life and I know what Micah is going through.  I wanted to work with someone his age, because he is at such an important stage of development.  That's what I would have wanted for me growing up; a guy to look up to.  Now, I want to be that positive male influence for him.”

Roman and Micah have certainly built a relationship that will last for years to come.  As Micah says, “I hope we are friends for a long time like the Littles who had their Bigs in their weddings.”  And Roman would like to encourage YOU to experience the immeasurable rewards of being a Big Brother.  “I want to especially encourage African American males to get involved.  We need men that are willing to step up and be a mentor and friend to the many boys who need one.  There are a lot of men who say they are busy, but if you really want to make a difference you can find the time.  Just a few hours a month can be the difference for a child.”

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